I’ve spent most of my life searching for an end to my beginning. For the longest time, I experienced myself trying so hard to finish everything that I start, without ever stopping to truly experience a single moment. No matter what the situation, dinner, parties, even trips, I waited for it to end. I was so anxious to finish that I never cared to live. I spent years of my life, anxious to reach an unreachable destination. I didn’t feel like what I was living was really even a life.
A few weeks ago, one of my friends came up with the idea to go to the beach and watch the sun set together. The idea perplexed me on a certain level because the concept of watching something simply to look at it confused me. What was the point?
As I sat there denying the possibility a single image could be worth 5 hours of my time, the sky began to change. I looked up and watched as oranges, greens and pinks began to flood the sky, swirling around and into themselves. The sheer intensity of the colors blew me away. I sat right in the sand, next to my friend simply staring in wonder as the world changed before me. Once the sun finally set, I was so exposed in the best way possible, staring up at what seemed to be infinity. I looked up in the sky realizing that each one of the stars was both a tiny speck and a flaming ball of inexplicable size. I too was just a speck in the universe but at the same time I was one with it. I turned my head slowly to the side, time seemingly slowing, thinking only one thing: “No matter how long I live, I will never forget how unbelievably beautiful this moment is.” Now looking at my friend, I burst out into tears, physically and emotionally moved by the images and feelings of a single sunset. In a single moment my life felt complete. I will never miss a moment again.