And because of this, I always try too hard to impress people. I mean, how else am I going to get people to like me? It’s so hard for me to say no to favors, not attend parties, or not spend time with people. I make so many sacrifices I later regret just so I make sure people would like me.
Sometimes its so bad to the point where I focus so much on making sure I’m liked in a group, that I forget to truly enjoy the time I spend with them. Sometimes, I even lose sight of who I am...I can't tell the difference between what I want for myself and what others want from me. I am aware of all of this, and still I cannot help it.
Do they know who I really am? If they knew, would they still like me? Even reading my own words right now, I get sick to the stomach. I just sound like a sympathy-craving spoiled brat, who doesn't appreciate all her blessings in life. And I know I'm happy, I know I'm lucky, I know I'm loved. But unfortunately, this is how insecure I am...for no apparent reason. Just what is it going to take to prove to me that I am worthwhile?
Wdydwyd? Because if I don't, I'm afraid everyone is waiting for a cue to turn and run