...because I'm expected to perform.

[Neyshia Go]

When I was still in the womb, my father placed a pair of headphones playing “The Sound of Music,” on my mother’s belly. I believe that my musical journey began at this point, as a musically inclined fetus. I was a painfully shy child growing up, but I always had the insatiable urge to perform. At the age of four I began performing for family and friends. By the time I was seven I began taking singing lessons, and at the age of eleven, I had won my first state singing competition. From then on, there was no looking back. When I was 14 years old, I sang at the word-famous Apollo Theater and received a standing ovation. In 2007 I made the “Top 50” of American Idol and performed on various TV shows around the world. I am currently a jazz vocal performance major at UCLA and perform at major sporting events and travel and work as a singer. When I step on stage I feel infallible. I feel that I need to be a perfect entertainer, in appearance and talent.That’s where the glamour of it all ends. My accomplishments have not come without difficulty and drawbacks. Growing up, I felt the pressure many performing children and teens do. The pressure to be perfect loomed above me wherever I went. It originated on the stage, but it seeped into my personal and everyday life. I felt like everyday was a new performance and I had to constantly impress everyone to prove my own self worth. After painfully dealing with image issues, eating disorders, and personal battles, I am I finally able to accept who I am. I am not defined by the things I do. I am not JUST a performer. I am not a perfect person who uses a façade to mask her own insecurities. I am not a product of superficiality and egoism, which stems from the music business. I am a strong woman above all things who is capable of making mistakes and am able to accept my imperfections that make me a person who exists in reality.