Who am I? I’m still sorting that out, so get back to me in a few years for the whole picture. Fortunately, at the moment, I do have some of the puzzle pieces fitted together. For instance, I know I am an understanding girl. That’s kind of ironic though because I don’t understand myself entirely. And yet I feel like I understand others pretty well. Does that make me a hypocrite? Because I have this notion that I am understanding, I tend to listen a lot. I do this quite simply because I am led to do it. An unseen force draws me into conversation with people and once I start listening, I can’t stop. I crave more insight and I only say little things to prompt the person to keep talking. On occasion, I do what I do to please others because I want to be liked and people like to talk about themselves. If I’m not liked, I feel inept. This reaction of mine is something I wish to change about myself. I guess change feels productive, which is another reason I do what I do. When I feel like I need change, I do something about it because I am only content when I am productive. Sometimes I just have compelling feelings to throw things off tall buildings and run through the rain naked, which must mean that I’m bored and I need change in my life. I don’t know what that has to do with wanting to better understand people, but that is what I want to do sometimes. But it’s not something I actually do, so maybe that makes me a hypocrite too. I guess I don’t do those things because I have a feeling of self-preservation. Perhaps self-preservation is what people need in order understand one another on a basic level. If we had that, there would be no suicide bombings or wars. I do all these things because I won’t do the things I actually think about doing. This much I understand.
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