I am in college - a time for self-discovery. I often find myself stressed in self-exploration whether it is what major I am going to choose or the next step I will take after my days on campus. Despite all the questions I ask myself, one thing that is a bit easier to answer is why I do what I do. Though it may seem simple, I realize what I do is be a good friend. It may not seem like much but I feel in doing so I have a sense of meaning in my life.
When I was younger, I remember there were certain times that I felt a bewildering sense of uncertainty. I was doubtful of my abilities and wondered at times if what I did mattered. I would hope for someone to reach out and say something comforting. I wished that someone would be able to see past my façade of calmness and read more into the subtle lines of worry on my face and feelings of insecurity in my soul. Over time I was able have a better sense of self and greater confidence in my abilities by learning from my mistakes as well as having those token people who would take the extra minute out of their day to tell me that I was doing just fine. I have always felt so thankful for those people who would take the time to talk and comfort me by telling me things would be all right. They gave me a sense of hope and helped me to find my inner strength.
There are times where I have met some people who remind me a bit of myself. I recognize their shyness and sense a secret longing in them for someone to reach out. That’s where I like to be a friend, to say those words of reassurance I wish I had heard at those times when I felt alone and show them I care. When I ask how someone is, I sincerely want to know what’s going on in his or her life or what is brewing below the surface. I like being the friendly ear to someone who might bottle up his or her emotions like I used to do.
Within the family of friends I have back at home, I am known for being a very caring and compassionate soul. I am the friend who writes a letter or makes a phone call to see how you are doing, who enjoys whimsical adventures as equally as deep conversations, who will stop by your house after you have broken up with your significant other just to be with you, and who feels happy knowing you are happy. And I love being that person. I love being able to feel an intimate level of connection with someone. The ability to be vulnerable with another human being after developing a strong bond of trust is one of those precious things in life. As my family and I have learned, it is those kinds of relationships that help us survive and overcome hardship and are most treasured at the end of the day.
At a time where I’m still discovering who I am, I feel comforted by knowing what I do as a friend is meaningful and substantial. To love another person as I do my best friends, gives me a sense of emotional satisfaction. I am learning what it means to love another human being and I feel a sense of purpose in being able to share that compassion and create invaluable relationships. I am a loving, good friend. I love because I find purpose and in purpose I feel peace.
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